thea:keepin' on keepin' on

I have been having trouble wrapping my mind around my project recently. I have experienced a set back, that is true, but I don't even think that that is the problem. My main issue is that I want to change the definition of found. It's not just about trash anymore. It's about the materials that surround me, not just the disposable ones and how they can be the brush strokes in the painting that will be Haben's mas. i am viewing objects in a whole new way. like a hungry cartoon caracter goes around and everything looks like a chicken leg, I go around and everything looks like a thing that I could use. I mentally attach it to the final piece. Like for instance, I have a space blanket. It looks like gold foil on one side and aluminum foil on the otherside. It was bought for me by my mother as a joke, not as a practical blanket. I dont even know why I brought it with me, it is a survival tool in a cold place or after a marathon, I would not necessarily ever use it practically. It serves little to no purpose in my life now but when i look at it, i see it as a pleated skirt, shining in the moon light or stretched over a wire frame to make a stunning head dress. It is not trash, it is mine, but it will be in my final piece. One of my professors has indformed me that she will be bringing me a defunct DVD player for me to take apart and use as interesting bits. many of my friends have been giving me their used phone cards which I know I will be able to use (see previous post on phone cards).
There is a different sort of serendipity about this work now than there was before. Now its more about what I can get my hands on and less about rules and regualtions to live by, less about the stress i feel picking up garbage by the side of the road. Its no longer about the push and the pain but about the art I love, to see how I can make the best possible mas out of whatever I have available. I owe that to Haben and myself. Each step I take feels like a step in the right direction, and so long as I feel that way I will continue on.


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